Penguins Struggle in Loss to Scorpions

Walpole, Ma - The Lutfy-Tragakis duo did it again last night, with a perfectly executed pass from Lutfy being drilled home by Tragakis, to make it 1-0 in the first period of last night's tilt against the Scorpions. For the second game in a row, the OML provided the point scoring, which unfortunately was not enough for the Penguins to beat the Scorpions.

"We can't do this," Eggman commented after the game. "We can't leave the goal scoring up to the OML. These guys are old...really, really old. How many games do you think these guys have left in them? One? Two? It is only a matter of time before one of them is carted off to a nursing home. The YGL (Young Guy Line) needs to step it up with or without Hickey!"

With Dimock, Kenney and Hickey out, the team was hurting in the goal scoring department. Kenney had a goal and an assist in the win over Coops Bar and Grill, and Hickey obviously has had some success in the past with goal scoring. And Dimock is a body...so he's got that going for him.

"You guys made fun of me for being so young," whined Hickey from his hotel room in Washington DC. "Now who's laughing you old, fat doo-doos? I'm laughing from under my sheets at night! At night, I build a sheet fort, and play with my flashlight and laugh quietly at night under my covers, so that my parents don't hear me. They don't like it when I stay up too late!"

One issue being raised to the NESHL, is the referee who looks like the magician from frosty the snowman. It became apparent last night that he is actually blind, when he asked for a Penguins player to 'guide him to the face-off circle'. At one point, Cronin skated between his legs without the referee even noticing.

"The cool thing is, my helmet didn't even touch his bag," Cronin giggled. "I love skating under a guys bag..."

The good news for the night is that the Penguins increased their PIM by a solid 6 minutes last night, with penalties from Eggman, Curchin and Cronin, and that Bilbo brought doughnuts.

"I'm proud of those boys," reflected coach Jacques Douchey from his home in Toronto. "It is good to see that they are still playing hockey. It is a men's team, no? I know that they are following a game plan, one that I intend to help with in the not to distant future. Go Pelicans!"